There are all sorts of ways to be a feminist in today’s world. If we erased all the ways in which we are different, we would lose so much strength in the movement. We won’t end sexism without addressing all oppressions; we can’t work together until we agree that none of us are free until we’re all free. But how can we work together at this point?

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“I mean it as a compliment when I notice you’ve lost weight!” Okay. But just because you’re well-intentioned doesn’t mean what you say doesn’t have a harmful impact. I know your perception of me might have changed because you’re socialized to believe smaller is better, but there are better ways to behave when you notice someone has lost weight.

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