EVERYDAY FEMINISM

Sex

8 Refreshing Approaches to Positive Sex for People of All Sizes

Empty, messy bed

“Let’s talk about (fat) sex!” We don’t talk about it nearly enough, but it’s an important part of both sex positivity and body positivity. Just think of all the ways sexuality is stripped from people who are considered fat. Now read this introduction to “Sex at Every Size,” a new set of practices to help us move beyond society’s limits and feel sexy at any size.

It’s Time: How to Talk to Your Middle Schooler About Porn

Parents talking to their middle schooler

With the way young people today are so wired into the media, it’s no surprise that many parents are looking for advice after discovering their child looking at porn. Here are helpful recommendations for what to say to your middle schooler, what you can stop worrying about, and how you can make this communication as healthy, informative, and comfortable as possible.

Why Don’t We Talk About Painful Sex?

Person sitting on a couch, leaning against their own arms, looking worried or contemplative

Sex should never hurt. This is true regardless of a person’s gender, irrespective of the kind of sex that someone is having (consensual and desired pain-play notwithstanding), and it’s true whether it’s a person’s first or 401st time. But why are so many people resigned to having painful sex? Well, partly because we don’t talk about it enough. So let’s start now.

Along Came Poly: A Polyamorous Person’s Guide to Coming Out to Your Monogamous Partner

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So you’ve figured out that you’re polyamorous. Awesome! But you’re also currently in a monogamous relationship. Uh-oh. Entering into a polyamorous relationship from a previously monogamous one can take work – but not only is it not impossible. It also can lead to healthier, more fulfilling relationships! Check out this comic to learn how to talk to your partner about your polyamory.

This Touching Note to Self Can Inspire You to Face Your Insecurities

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A casual sexual encounter is no big deal, right? Except that sometimes you carry with you your insecurities, the complexities of your identity, and painful memories from the past – and then it can be a pretty big deal. Here’s one poet’s moving note to self. We could all use this reminder that you have nothing to be ashamed of, and your body needs your voice.

5 Reasons Shaming Survivors into Reporting Rape Is Counter-Productive

Person looking seriously into the camera

(Trigger Warning: Rape and rape culture) Do you believe reporting rape is the best way to fight rape culture? A lot of people do, and it’s understandable to think that reporting rape would lead to more rape convictions and prevention. But the truth is, it’s not that simple. To tackle rape culture, we have to challenge the dangerous idea that survivors have a responsibility to report and support the choices of survivors.

From Stripping to Sex Tapes – The Kardashians, Amber Rose, and Our Love of Hating Women

From Stripping to Sex Tapes - The Kardashians, Amber Rose, and Our Love of Hating Women

We all have more important things to worry about than Twitter beef between model Amber Rose and reality star Khloe Kardashian. But like it or not, it’s a hot topic. So what does that say about us? Here’s why this isn’t just a trivial catfight, but a moment that tells us what we need to know about our role in the media’s perpetuation of a dangerous kind of sexism.

50 Shades of Grey: Kink or Abuse?

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There’s been a lot of criticism in feminist and kink communities over the “Fifty Shades of Grey” series – first as novels, and now as movies. And the biggest problem is that what’s being depicted here isn’t really BDSM – it’s intimate partner violence, from stalking behavior to ignoring safe words. Watch this video to learn more about the controversy.

Healthy Relationships Come in All Shapes and Sizes

Too often, conversations around what healthy relationships look like completely ignore relationships that fall outside of the heterosexual, monogamous framework that our society so desperately wants us to cling to. But there are all sorts of ways to have relationships – including within asexuality, polyamory, and kink – and they all can be healthy and satisfying.

Let Them Eat Cake: On Being Demisexual

The demisexual flag: White at the top and gray at the bottom with a black triangle and purple stripe

If you feel like sex is “kind of like dessert – a good thing when it happens, but not something you would actively seek out” because you need a deep emotional connection in order to experience sexual desire, it’s possible that you could be demisexual. Check out this author’s journey from confusion to asexuality to coming out as demisexual.