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4 Things Not To Do When Your Friend Calls You Out
You need to understand that your marginalized friends don’t want to call you out. It’s even more uncomfortable for us than it is for you, because in the end, all we want is for you to be on our side, and there’s always a chance that you won’t be. So here, for you, is a list of things not to do when a friend finally summons up the courage it takes to tell you what’s what.
Read MoreHow to Be a Good Ally to Fat People Who Appear to Have Lost Weight
“I mean it as a compliment when I notice you’ve lost weight!” Okay. But just because you’re well-intentioned doesn’t mean what you say doesn’t have a harmful impact. I know your perception of me might have changed because you’re socialized to believe smaller is better, but there are better ways to behave when you notice someone has lost weight.
Read MoreA Personal Story about Calm Waters, Closed Mouths, and Other Ways Women Might Die
Have you ever been defined through a calm waters lens? You know the type, right? That “Why does she always have to make shit so uncomfortable for everybody by speaking out?” type. Surely, there are moments when the best thing to do is to shut up and wait for safety. But don’t default to that logic, because your safety and your enslavement aren’t always the only two choices you have.
Read MoreHow to Deal with Who People Don’t Realize They’re Being Offensive
Some people may not be discriminatory at heart, but old habits die hard. Unfortunately, offensive language and implications are cultural habits most people acquire without realizing it. Some of these scenarios are what I like to call Accidental ‘-isms.’ But you have the power to shape your conversations. So here are some of my ideas for confronting your next Accidental ‘-ism.’
Read More5 Ways Society Breeds Vagina-Hate (And How to Combat It)
Society isn’t very nice to vaginas. From a very young age, we’re taught that vaginas are somehow bad or wrong or dirty. But the fact is: Vaginas are the objects of a cultural hate-fest. What if we could fight back against that hate, through sex- and body-positivity, and turn haters into lovers? We can. But first, we have to understand where vagina hate comes from.
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