When Matt and I had first started seeing each other, I often feared that he liked me only because, to him, I was a rare sight. But I put it out of my mind. I didn’t want to think about it. I realize now that our relationship didn’t fail simply because he was white and I was Asian. It failed because we had different values systems.

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I hear it all too often: “I’m not racist, but I just wouldn’t date [insert race/ethnicity].” If you have to start a sentence with a clarification that you’re not racist, that’s a pretty good indicator that you need to reevaluate whatever you’re about to say. You can’t know whether or not you have chemistry with someone unless you get to know them. So be open-minded.

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