I used to be overcome with guilt at the thought of being an artist, a writer since it doesn’t guarantee status or a regular paycheck. Having worked as migrant laborer since a child, I grew up associating my worth with work and writing as gratuitous and useless. Since then I’ve been figuring out how to follow my dreams. I’m not fully living off of my art yet but I’d like to pass on some advice that have helped me.
Construction jobs allow for upward mobility, making it a desirable career choice for many. However, while sex discrimination is illegal, many construction sites have anti-women attitudes, making construction jobs less desirable and/or torturous for women. I know first hand because I was one female out of a total of about 10 women in a site with hundreds of men.
I was groped at work by a woman. My immediate response was to pretend it never happened. My solution was to hold myself responsible and try to “learn from the experience” and “do better in the future.” If that’s how I handled a minor transgression, what must the cultural shame for a major one feel like? But the truth is, she never should have groped me. And I still have trouble believing that.
CultureMap, who I was a columnist for, ran an article speculating that perhaps the girl who reported being raped by a high school baseball star was lying – without citing any details that imply that other than “kids are supposed to lie.” To make sure they knew I wasn’t secretly cool with treating victims as probable liars, as long as they wrote me checks, I wrote that it was bullsh*t and got fired for it. (Trigger Warning)
The economy still sucks right now and you may find yourself unemployed. In our society, we too often give people value according to how much they earn and stigmatize people without jobs. So if you’re unemployed, chances are your self-esteem is suffering. But regardless of whether or not you have a job, remember that you are still worth taking care of.
The question of whether or not to come out at work is a loaded one if it’s not clear how gay-friendly it is — one that many fear will have an impact on their hiring potential, career path, and employment status. The decision to come out is a highly personal one and one you shouldn’t feel pressured or guilty about. Here are some pros and cons to weigh and tips on coming out, if you choose to.
Dear Mr. Sexist, I’d like to thank you for everything you’ve taught me over the past 25 years. Why, I had no idea I was so fat, ugly and stupid. I thought being a Size 12 was perfectly acceptable. But when you yelled across the newsroom, “I want two inches off your hair and two inches off your arse,” suddenly, a light went on.
The fact is that a fulfilled mother is a good mother. When we let the argument devolve into SAHM vs. WOHM we lose the opportunity to make valuable change.