You searched for patriarchy hurts men - Page 4 of 90 - Everyday Feminism

When women write about feminism, some men threaten them with rape and murder, call them “man-haters,” verbally abuse them, and more. But men’s online harassment of women seems to go unquestioned, even defended, in most circles. So it’s not enough for me to simply not harass women myself – if I don’t raise my voice when I see this, I’m letting the Limbaughs be the lone voices of my gender.

If there are women in the room, their objectification seems to be a bonding mechanism for butches and men. The patriarchy barters and trades with women as currency, and in those moments, we’re doing the same thing. But I know that we can be empowered without using our power in a way that hurts people. Our masculinity doesn’t have to turn femmes into objects whenever our masculinity is questioned.

WAIT – if MRAs are so anti-feminist, then how can we agree with their points? Here’s where men’s rights activists are on the right track – and what they’re missing.

These examples of mansplaining in sports are cringeworthy. But do you know the real impact this condescending habit is having?

A person with long dark hair is holding a small child to their chest. The child looks worried.

“Leave it to feminazis to turn this into a ‘feminist’ issue.” MRAs have claimed the circumcision debate (intactivism). Is this about human rights or an excuse to terrorize women?

“You’re being too emotional.” Have you ever experienced or participated in these common ways of tone policing women? This information from Celia Edell can help us put a stop to it.

“It was not uncommon to hear ‘There is no worse fate than to be fat and gay.’” Cristen Conger is examining some of the top theories on body image on gay men. Do any of them relate to your experience?

A person scratches their head in confusion

Men can make positive contributions to feminism, but are there drawbacks to celebrating men just for calling themselves feminists? This author grappled with his own relationship to feminism as he wondered what it means to hold feminist men accountable. Find out how he learned that contributing to the movement means so much more than just calling himself a feminist.

Black shirt with "#MENINIST" written across the front in white against a red background

What’s up with men’s rights advocates? Maybe you’ve read their commentary, and maybe you’ve wanted them to shut the hell up about so-called “men’s oppression.” But is there any truth to what they’re saying? What are their worries, and who are the true champions of gender equality? Let’s get into the concerns, the myths, and the real story behind men’s rights.

When we teach young boys how to “act like a man,” what are we really teaching them? Poet Joseph Capehart argues that our socially constructed view of masculinity is wolf-like: violent, aggressive, and emotionless. And our boys – and later, our men – struggle with and suffer from that. So watch this performance and rethink what masculinity means to you and yours.

Trans men, like all people, need to know how to have fulfilling, safe, healthy sex to feel whole and good about ourselves. We deserve it (and don’t let anyone tell you differently). But most out trans boys, trans men, and trans masculine people I know receive inadequate, if not wholly non-existent, sex talks. So here are seven key places to start.

In his spoken word poem “Action,” Guante reflects on how he should have held his friend accountable for the abusive way he spoke about and treated his girlfriend. He analyzes how the media teaches men to think of sex as violence and to victim blame. This poem asks men to speak up and reminds them that rape culture is dependent on their silence and complacency.

When you think “eating disorders,” do you automatically think of women? It’s true that women are more commonly affected by eating disorders, but millions of men and boys also battle them. Yet, because our society sees eating disorders as a “women’s issue,” we often overlook and minimize how eating disorders affect men. So check out this infographic to learn more.

There are a lot of misconceptions about genital reconstruction. “It’s just cosmetic.” “You need therapy, not surgery.” “It’s not like it’s life or death.” And that’s just for general reconstruction conversations! There are even more specific myths about individual kinds of surgery — ie: trans men. Here are eight non-truths about trans men’s genital reconstruction!

Ever wish you could get inside the heads of men and figure out what they’re thinking when they cat call women? Street harassment is a widespread problem, and the first step to solving a problem is understanding the motivations. Check out this Buzzfeed video for a glimpse into the mind of a street harasser! (Spoiler alert: it’s a pretty sad place to be.)

There is a war against women, and men and boys are trained everyday to be the soldiers. Misogynist violence isn’t the biological imperative of men. Misogyny is beaten into boys and woven into the fabric of “successful masculinity”. It’s time for men in the millions to declare that we will no longer act as the soldiers in the war against women.

A key part of patriarchy is that men shouldn’t feel or express their feelings, except when they’re angry. With pervasive messages like “boys don’t cry” and “man up,” guys often don’t feel comfortable or know how to process their feelings. So let’s unpack why it can be so hard for men to feel and how they can start.

With this time of year comes an increase in street harassment. So let me say it plainly to my male-identified people out there: Street harassment and leering are never okay. It’s all harassment. It’s all misogyny. And it all needs to stop. And since men are the primary perpetrators of street harassment, men bear the responsibility for ending it.

The search for one’s own definition of what it means to be a man is an important part of maturity for young men. Many men look to popular culture for what male behavior is supposed to be and how we’re supposed to display it. But male-oriented advertising too often uses hyper-masculine images to sell products. Let’s take a look at just what they’re selling.

Some believe that since gay men do not want to be sexually intimate with women, our uninvited touching and groping is benign. In a culture that doesn’t see gay men as “men”, our sexist acts are instead read as “diva worship” or “celebrating women” even when they are acts of objectification, assault, and dehumanization. We must question these assumptions in ourselves and in our communities.