You searched for patriarchy hurts men - Page 3 of 90 - Everyday Feminism

Humanism and feminism are not mutually exclusive and can coexist. A vested interest in general human welfare is an implicit goal of feminism. If you’re helping women, you’re helping people. Some might prefer to call this humanitarianism, humanism, or being-a-decent-human-being-ism, but many of us are content to call it feminism. And there’s nothing exclusionary about that.

Victim-blaming is a fundamental part of protecting privilege and deflecting accountability. However, as this gif set demonstrates, sometimes it just takes a good ally to help people see the parallels in their struggles. And, in Everyday Feminism’s opinion, meeting people where they’re at is a great strategy to encourage empathy and facilitate social justice.

Patriarchy affects how custody battles are eventually ruled – and not because the court is particularly in favor of women. It’s true that mothers are more likely to receive custody of their children in a divorce. But the source of the bias is not in the courts – it’s in the marriage. So if we want to change the role of fathers in divorce, we must first address the roles of fathers in the home.

When women express discomfort with sexism, men in particular jump to the conclusion that they must be man haters to make such a fuss. This seems to be the primary deterrent preventing women from speaking out against sexism. But here’s the thing: Being against sexism is not the same thing as being against men. Let’s debunk five myths about this misconception.

I want to see a masculinity where love, power with, and compassion replace dominance, power over, and violence — a masculinity where some of those good messages I learned from the men in my life endure while leaving behind the destructive things that hurt me and so many other male-identified people. In short, we need a new way to understand ourselves as men.

“Do I have to break up with him?” What does it mean to date a man who’s got all the feminist lingo down, but fails to live by feminist values?

Warning: Men who claim to be feminist aren’t immune from toxic behavior. Here are red flags to watch out for that come up in too many feminist men.

If you’ve ever tried to talk about feminism to anyone, you’ve probably heard this line: “If feminism is really about equality, then why does it only focus on women’s issues? What about men?” Here to dispel some misconceptions about what feminism really means is vlogger Marina Watanabe. Watch her no-nonsense summary of why, no, feminism is not in fact sexist.

Often, straight men become frustrated when they meet a woman who doesn’t trust them immediately. They’re frustrated that women impose a “guilty until proven innocent” mentality on all men. But there are reasons why women feel this way. If we can work to understand those reasons, we can learn how to work with her in a supportive role, if that’s what she wants.

Infertility is not a battle of the worst off or a race to the bottom of despair. Whether men or women hurt more is irrelevant. But men have a cultural narrative that says kids are fun but optional, and “real men” have aggressive, uber-sperm so potent it makes babies from across the room. And this makes infertility issues a place where men find little support. It’s time we change the narrative.

This author’s students have shared some troubling ideas about being “immune” to racism as Asian Americans. Here’s a reality check.

What does it mean to “look” straight or queer? It really doesn’t mean anything – but we make assumptions about people’s orientation all the time. Here’s a touching account of why this issue matters.

Person looking sad

We can relate to this – solidarity in our movements, but hurting each other in our personal lives. Can you?

These innocent assumptions can do a lot of damage. Are any of them assumptions you’ve made?

It may be obvious why girls need feminism – but what about boys (or children assumed to be boys)? Here are good reasons to share feminism with your sons.

Want to say “not all men” because you’re not like that? Actually, distancing any man from the problem of sexism is dangerous – read this to find out why.

“Grow thicker skin!” Microaggressions are small forms of discrimination – which may make you wonder if you or other people are just being too sensitive when microaggressions hurt. This comic puts that theory to rest.

Against a blue background, a white speech bubble reads "Not All Feminists Are Lesbians!"

Dispelling anti-feminist myths can look like proving we’re not all bra-burning, man-hating lesbians. But do you know what you’re implying the with “we’re not all lesbians” defense?

Venessa Marco was just trying to buy lunch when a man asked her if she “knows how to deep throat.” And this isn’t an isolated incident. Most of us can remember a time when we were going about our days when all of a sudden, we’re reminded that a man doesn’t view us as a person, but as an object. Check out this awesome poem to see how Venessa handled the situation.

As male feminists, it’s easy to criticize the misogyny of the MRAs. But how often do we turn the lens around? There are stories from every era of the feminism — stories of men talking the talk of feminism, gaining trust, and using that trust to hurt, abuse, and act in profoundly anti-feminist ways. Here are six things we need to do starting right now to fight this.