I recently wrote a piece on my personal blog that highlighted seven men who are transforming masculinity, and I was blown away by how well it resonated. In reflecting on the post, I realized that it was so popular because it touched on an unfilled need. We need to talk about what a more inclusive masculinity could actually look like beyond “Real men cry, too.”

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Any time sexual assault is brought up, chances are there will be voices complaining that “if they were really raped, they should go to the police.” But that is far from fair. There are many reasons people don’t involve the police, none of which have to do with whether or not a rape actually happened. Here are eight barriers that keep survivors from reporting.

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Aside from all the merriment that “Over the Hill” jokes bring, something deeper is also allowing for everyone to see making fun of all of the stereotypes of older age as being necessary and perhaps the only way to “deal with” getting older. Which social and cultural condition makes this type of thinking possible? Well, not to put too fine a point on it: ageism.

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The depiction of rape in the media is not an inherently bad thing. But it is a bad thing when rape is part of a story line just for entertainment, for added suspense and sparkle. When television shows like Law & Order: SVU use and capitalize on rape as a means to allure viewers, the “featured” rape story becomes reduced to a mere gimmick, which is troubling and offensive.

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I write this to speak to transgender men who love, desire, and have sex with other men (cis and trans). I write to you with a request. It is not common to discuss the homophobia that exists within our trans men and queer boi communities, especially among those of us who are of color. So brothers, please let’s talk about it now before it’s too late.

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