HUGH JASOLL: You know, for my new year’s resolution, I was thinking about only using ze and zir. Doesn’t it just sound so much more inclusive?
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: I could tell! It’s the voice.
HUGH JASOLL: They? That’s not a pronoun.
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Sorry, sorry. I keep getting your pronouns wrong. It’s just—it’s really hard for me.
HUGH JASOLL: You know, I don’t really identify as cis, and it makes me feel really marginalized when you call me that.
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Oh my God, I love RuPaul’s Drag Race! You should totally be on that!
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: So what do you think of this Chaz Bono thing? I think it’s great you guys have, like, a role model!
HUGH JASOLL: So, what’s your real name?
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: You are so brave.
HUGH JASOLL: No, no! Your real name.
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Look, I know a lot of drag queens, and they all use that word.
HUGH JASOLL: Don’t worry! Once gay marriage is legalized, we’re gonna stop discriminating against you, too.
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: So have you had the surgery yet?
HUGH JASOLL: Has she had the surgery yet?
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Has he had the surgery?
HUGH JASOLL: Has she had the surgery yet?
HUGH JASOLL: Oh my God, you really can’t tell!
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Hey, what are you doing in my house!
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: …If you wanna pass…
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: You transgenders are so inspiring.
HUGH JASOLL: You know, I’m just really happy you’re finally going to be one or the other.
HUGH JASOLL: My cousin’s best friend is gay, so I totally get it.
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Who do you have sex with?
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: I didn’t even know you were gay!
HUGH JASOLL: Hey, did you hear about John?
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: I read Middlesex and I cried. Like, bawled.
HUGH JASOLL: Why would you want to do something like that?
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: I look like such a tr*nny today! You know what I mean.
HUGH JASOLL: I’ll call you “she” when you get the surgery.
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Wait, cis?! What does that mean!
HUGH JASOLL: Oh him? I’ve known him since he was Melissa.
HUGH JASOLL: Have they had the surgery?
BLACK DAHLIA PARTON: Has she had the surgery yet?
HUGH JASOLL: Did she have the surgery?
BOTH (in unison): Have you had the surgery yet?