Panel One
Text: Your Cinematic Crush is a Stalker: Say Anything.
Text: How the Romantic Lead Acts
Lloyd and Diane (two teenagers) speak to one another from across a lawn. Lloyd is holding up a boombox and standing on the grass. Diane speaks from a window on the first floor of her house.
Lloyd: Even though you asked me to leave you alone and you are distressed because your father was just put in jail, I want your undivided attention and am willing to demand it.
Panel Two
Text: How the Love Interest Responds
Diane: Well, my life just got turned upside down, so you may as well follow me when I go to college in Europe because I need a strong male in my life.
Panel Three
Text: What Should Happen
Lloyd has lowered his boombox and appears startled. Diane is pointing at him in an accusatory manner and frowning.
Diane: You are trespassing, harassing me, and I’m pretty sure playing that song for 24 hours violates a noise ordinance! Get off my property!
Panel Four
Text: Your Cinematic Crush is a Stalker: Twilight
Edward and Bella (a 119-year-old vampire and a high school student) are in a bedroom speaking to one another in front of a window through which the moon can be seen.
Text: How the Romantic Lead Acts
Edward: I broke into your house to watch you sleep, and I fantasize about violently killing you.
Panel Five
Text: How the Love Interest Responds
Bella: That’s okay. I trust you to restrain yourself from hurting me because we love each other.
Panel Six
Text: What Should Happen
Edward is still in the main part of the bedroom next to the window, but Bella is crouched in her closet with a cell phone in one hand held up to her ear. Her other arm is wrapped around her drawn-up legs.
Bella: 911? A boy who told me he wants to kill me is in my room. I’m in my closet, please send help!
Panel Seven
Text: Your Cinematic Crush is a Stalker: The Breakfast Club
Text: How the Romantic Lead Acts
Bender and Clare (two high school students) are standing in front of Clare’s father’s car, speaking to each other a short distance apart.
Bender: I sexually assaulted you and did my utmost to destroy your self-esteem in one day. We should date.
Panel Eight
Text: How the Love Interest Responds
Bender holds out his hand and Clare places a diamond earring in his palm.
Clare: Banging you will piss off my dad, so okay! Here, let me give you this diamond as proof of commitment.
Panel Nine
Text: What Should Happen
Clare has her hands on her hips and is frowning at Bender, who has his hands raised and a worried look on his face.
Clare: You sexually assaulted me in front of three witnesses. You’re going to jail.
Panel Ten
Text: Your Cinematic Crush is a Stalker: 50 Shades of Grey
Text: How the Romantic Lead Acts
Christian and Ana (a millionaire in his late twenties and a college student in her early twenties) are riding in the back seat of a car together.
Christian: I’m a man of unusual tastes, and once I coerce you into a commitment, I’ll never let you leave.
Panel Eleven
Text: How the Love Interest Responds
Ana: Wonderful! My lack of experience tells me that soon you’ll feel real affection for me instead of possessive jealousy.
Panel Twelve
Text: What Should Happen
Ana has crossed her arms and is looking askance at Christian, who looks cautious.
Ana: So your kink is restraining orders? Or is it lawsuits? Because I’m seeing a lot of both in your future.