5 Common Fears That Stop People From Calling Themselves Feminists

July 2, 2015 / Melissa A. Fabello

Melissa A. Fabello’s answering just one question: Why is it so scary to call yourself a feminist? She’s got some answers you might be able to relate to.

With Love,

The Editors at Everyday Feminism

Click for the Transcript

Hey! I’m Melissa Fabello, and you are watching Just One Question on Moral Courage TV.

I have a question that I’ve been thinking a lot about that maybe you’ve been thinking a lot about – and that is “Why is it so scary to call yourself a feminist?”

There are a lot of reasons why maybe you don’t want to identify as a feminist. But a lot of times, what it really boils down to is fear – and that’s totally normal. For me, it took me a really long time in my life before I even wanted to call myself a feminist.

There are so many myths around what feminism is that it makes people really shy away from it. Here are five examples of fears that you may have that are keeping you from identifying as a feminist.

You might feel afraid that people are going to misrepresent or misunderstand your sexual orientation. People might think that you’re gay, which is cool, unless you’re not. You might also be afraid that people are going to start thinking that you’re too serious and that you can’t take a joke.

Maybe you’re afraid that people are going to start thinking of you as man-hating. You might also be afraid that you’re going to alienate yourselves from the people that you love who don’t share your values.

Here’s the big one: You might be afraid that now that you’re thinking through this stuff, you’re going to have to change the way that you act in order to be in line with your values. Because it is scary. It is scary to say I am whatever because it feels kind of permanent.

But for me, calling myself a feminist is a really great way to keep myself accountable to make sure that my actions always match my values. And it’s important to think about whether or not that’s the thing that you’re really afraid of.

Maybe this rings true for you, and maybe it doesn’t – but either way, in the comments, let me know if you identify as a feminist. And if not, why not?

This is a collaboration with Everyday Feminism, where you can also find a bunch more of my videos. Check out the link in the description.

Remember the question – why is it so scary to call yourself a feminist? – and let me know in the comments if you can think of any other reasons why.

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Melissa A. Fabello, Co-Managing Editor of Everyday Feminism, is a sexuality educator, eating disorder and body image activist, and media literacy vlogger based out of Philadelphia. She enjoys rainy days, Jurassic Park, and the occasional Taylor Swift song and can be found on YouTube and Tumblr. She holds a B.S. in English Education from Boston University and an M.Ed. in Human Sexuality from Widener University. She is currently working on her PhD. She can be reached on Twitter @fyeahmfabello.

Moral Courage TV is a YouTube channel dedicated to telling the stories of people who are fighting corruption in their faith, culture, or workplace. Whether they are standing up to a bully, breaking up a gang, or simply seeking truth, the heroes of their stories refuse to fail. Check them out on YouTube and follow them on Twitter.