This Ad for a Phone That Cops Would Hate is the Realest Commercial Yet

[A Black family comes in to a phone store.]

Franchesca: Hi! How can I help you?

Mother: Our son is going away to college and we want to get him a new phone.

Franchesca: I think I can help you find something. Meet the IC50. This is one of the few phones with 4K video capability so you can capture holidays, snapchats, and senseless acts of police brutality all in sunning HD quality.

Son: Cool.

Father: Hang on. Won’t all that resolution eat up the memory?

Franchesca: Not at all. Its 128 gigabyte capacity can hold up to 40 hours of remorse-free police wrongdoing.

Father: That sounds about right.

Son: Can it do slow-mo?

Franchesca: Absolutely. At 240 frames per second it’s perfect for capturing even the hastiest fake evidence planting.

Mother: What about texting?

Franchesca: We’ve got an unlimited plan and texting is so easy, you can even do it in handcuffs after a false arrest.

Father: That sound good, but what’s the coverage?

Franchesca: With our national plan, you’ll have plenty of bars. We’ve got you covered with WiFi hotspots in Ferguson, Baltimore, and the 99 other locations around the country where police killed unarmed black people in 2014. Plus it’s got 4G.

Son: Awesome.

Father: Does it come with any insurance or extended warranty?

Speaker 1: You won’t need it. The IC50 is built to withstand the toughest situation like when a cop knocks it out of your hand for exercising your legal right to film them. See? [Throws phone on the floor.]

Son: Wow! [Picks up phone.]

Franchesca: The phone is totally fine!

Son: I love it.

Cop 1: Put the gun down!

Cop 2: We need back up.

Son: Oh, it’s just a phone. [Through the cops’ eyes, he’s now wearing a black hoodie and holding a gun in his hands.]

Cop 1: Put down the gun!

Son: [Back to his regular clothes and phone.] It’s a phone. See? [Back to the cops’ vision. He’s wearing the black hoodie and holding the gun up to his ear.] Hello? I just got it.

Cop 2: Suspect is an armed black male between five one and… six ten. We’re going to need the whole squad. [The son starts filming the encounter on the phone and the screen switches back to the cops’ vision, which now shows him holding a bigger gun and wearing a large shirt, gold chain, and white do-rag. He is aiming the gun at the police.]

Son: Relax, you’re in a phone store.

Cop 1: I said drop the weapon!

Son: [Back in original clothing and holding the phone.] This is a phone! [Turns to his family.] There are no guns shaped like this.

[He turns back to the cops. The screen returns to the cops’ vision and he’s now shirtless, carrying two very large guns out to his sides, and a Rambo-esque bandana and chest belts.] 

Cop 2: [Screaming in slow motion.] Where’s our back up?

[There’s a stare showdown that shows close-ups of multiple people’s eyes looking at each other intensely.]

White Male Employee: [Takes the phone from the son.] Looks like someone is ready to get a new phone!

Cop 2: Oh, wow. Is that the IC50? [Both cops put their guns away.]

Cop 1: I heard the camera on that thing is great.

White Male Employee: [Walks towards the cops.] You bet ya!

Father, Mother, and Son: [Turn around with scared expressions, talking to Franchesca.] We’ll take three!

Franchesca: Great!