While it’s important to understand the pleasurable aspects of sex, it’s almost important to understand why and how sex can be painful.
According to the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology, three out of every four women will experience painful intercourse at some point during her life.
Here are five of the most common reasons why for some cisgender women and trans men, sex hurts.
1. Vulvodynia
Vulvodyniais a complex disorder, most commonly characterized by a burning pain and other uncomfortable symptoms in and around the vulva.
It can be extremely frustrating, not only because it makes things like sex or sitting for long periods of time uncomfortable, but also because there are no outward symptoms. It has no links to previous infections. It can take a while for doctors to reach that diagnosis.
2. Vulvar Vestibulitis
Vulvar vestibulitis is actually a subset of vulvodynia, which denotes localized pain around the vestibule or vaginal opening, which makes vaginal penetration extremely uncomfortable.
3. Vaginitis
Up to one-third of people with vaginas will experience symptoms of vaginitis. This vaginal inflammation – which includes delightful symptoms such as discharge, itching, and burning in and out of the vulva region – is usually linked to yeast or bacterial infections.
The vagina is an ecosystem, and sometimes its pH levels just get out of whack, and that’s okay.
4. Vaginismus
Although they sound a lot like, vaginismus is a lot less common than vaginitis. This condition is actually an involuntary spasm of the muscles surrounding the vagina, which closes off the vaginal opening, making sex incredibly painful, if not impossible.
It’s also been described as a vaginal panic attack because a lot of times, it is linked to anxiety, shame, or even past sexual trauma.
If you are experiencing frequent and severely painful sex, go see a doctor. Treatments are available for all of these conditions, although some might take a little bit of time for you to start seeing a difference. But the sooner you start, hopefully the sooner you can stop experiencing that kind of pain.
5. Other Issues
Finally, painful sex can also be symptomatic of other issues, such as skin problems that can lead to tearing in the vulvular skin, endometriosis, ovarian cysts, or even simply not being aroused when vaginal penetration happens.
A lot of times when it comes to that old bleeding on the first time you have vaginal intercourse, it’s not so much to do with anything “breaking” or “popping.” A lot of times, it’s because [people with vaginas] aren’t sufficiently aroused and thus lubricated enough for smooth insertion without tearing the skin. That might have been too much information.
If it is a case of sexual response, things like masturbation to better understand what gets you going and also foreplay are usually advised as helpful ways to make sex less painful and hopefully a lot more—well—sexy.
Is there ever too much information, though, when it comes to understanding what’s going on inside our vaginas? No, the answer is no. No.
