Speaker 1: They have to be like, “Oh, no, this is my girlfriend Rose.” Then they’ll be like, “Oh, it’s so cute!” Or they’ll make a remark, or you’ll see that facial expressions where they’re like, “Ooh, homo!”
Keeping It a Secret
Speaker 2: He would ask me to meet him from work, and I was his friend.
Speaker 3: It’s quite easy to hide, I think, because you can just say, “I’m going to see my friend.”
Speaker 4: He wasn’t really allowed to meet my family, and it all had to be very hush-hush on my side.
Speaker 3: It’s quite common to be in a relationship where one person isn’t out, or one person’s family don’t know, which can make it really difficult.
Being Out in Public
Speaker 5: You can still walk down the street and feel uncomfortable holding your partner’s hand, because you might get the odd person that stares.
Speaker 3: There are both definitely points where you’ll subconsciously stop holding hands, because you’ll see somebody who you think might be giving you weird look or something.
Speaker 1: We call it “lesbo-heckling”.
Speaker 3: I had somebody once shout “That’s disgusting” after I kissed somebody on a train station platform.
Speaker 1: I think we snogged a few blocks down, and they’re like, “Ewwww, lesbians.”
Speaker 4: We get mistaken for siblings all the time. Like, it happens every week.
Speaker 5: I don’t know anyone that would go up to a street and just ask two random people if they’re siblings.
Speaker 4: We don’t look that similar, do we?
Speaker 5: No, everyone thinks we do.
Speaker 4: Maybe if you put your hair up, like in a quiff, like that. Maybe.
In the Bedroom
Speaker 6: There has been one occasion, actually, when we checked into a hotel, and the guy thought we were on a business trip so we got two separate bedrooms.
Speaker 2: There’s an initial power struggle, I think, between a lot of gay couples.
Speaker 4: Being asked who the woman in the relationship is. It’s like just because you might be a bottom it instantly makes you the female half of the relationship. It’s not true at all.
Speaker 2: I think straight people definitely think, “Oh, if you want sex, you can just go and do it.” It’s not… It takes some preparation on someone’s behalf.
Meeting New People
Speaker 1: They all assume that you’re friends automatically. I mean unless you’re both super gay looking, but even then straight people seem to be blind to that.
Speaker 6: Pressure I feel by some people to make you feel that your life has to be somehow different or your relationship is not the same equal merit as theirs and that you don’t have the same feelings for each other.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you get so used to “Oh my god, that’s cute. Oh, that’s nice for you.” When people are totally normal with it, you’re like, “What’s wrong? I’m not gay enough for you?”
Speaker 2: I mean, I want to be able to walk down the street and hold my boyfriend’s hand and then not be stared at.
Speaker 6: What needs to be more widely accepted is this feeling that relationships are just as equal as well, and they aren’t separate or different or less than anything.
Speaker 1: There’s definitely still struggles, but I think one day no one will have to come out maybe.