Sh*t White Girls Say to Latinas

October 7, 2014 / Christina Igaraividez

White people have a pretty substantial track record of reducing people different races and ethnicities down to whatever tired stereotypes they think are relevant. White women and Latinas are no exception.

Check out this hilarious video from comedian Christina Igaraividez compiling some of the most common stereotypical comments Latinas hear from white women.

Click for the Transcript

CHRISTINA: Are you Spanish?

I can’t even tell you’re Spanish!

You don’t even look Spanish!

Hey chica!

No, I mean like…where were you born?

You are so dark. Do you go tanning?

I love chalupas!

Your hair is so curly!

Can you make those?

Oh, you’re from Ecuador! How exotic. We don’t have a lot of those here.

It’s like a Mexican wrap, right?

Oh em gee, her last name is Garcia, too! Are you related?

Lupe, why does it smell like marijuana in here?

Would you ever date a white guy?

Can you, like, not speak Spanish with your friends around me? Rude!

So, can your brother fix my car?

Do you know how to say “taco” in English?

I love nachos! I can make those, right?

You’re gonna love this guy. His name is Juan.

Can you make chimichangas? I love those.

Can you, like, lower your bass?

Seriously, who names their son Jesus?

Can you, like, lower your bass?

I love Mexico. I’ve been to Cancun like five times.

Lower your bass!

I always wanted to learn Spanish! I just never did.

Oh, it’s like a Mexican pizza!

Lower el bass-o.

When we get to the club, let’s do tequila shots. Patrón!

Oh! It’s like a Mexican taco! Wait.

So, do you know anyone that can mow my lawn?

Do you know anyone that can fix our roof?

Is he a gang-banger? It’s okay if he is. It’s fine.

That’s not racist, right?

Let’s get tacos!

His name is José. You probably know him.

What kind of meat is that?

Can you, like, teach me that Shakira move? Right?

MAN: What are you doing?

CHRISTINA: Your mom sounds just like Gloria from Modern Family.

Lupe!

Just like her.

Is that like Spanish voodoo?

I’m sorry, but this is America.

Are you—are you praying?

Oh my God, tequila makes me crazy.

Well maybe we should make an all-white improv group.

That’s not racist, right?

Hasta la vista, baby! You know what that means.

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Christina Igaraividez is a Chicago native and has been performing, writing, and directing funnies since 2008. Whether it’s an ensemble production or sketch show for a coworker’s send off party, she is consistently (and sometimes unknowingly) working on how to get people to laugh out loud. She has been trained in improv and sketch at the some of the best institutions in the country: Second City, iO (formerly Improv Olympic), and the Annoyance. She can also be seen in theatrical productions and is currently an artistic associate of Teatro Luna, Chicago’s first and only all-Latina theater company (teatroluna.org). On her off time she is being inspired for her next project. Christina currently resides in New York City. Follow her on Twitter @chrixtina.